2011年10月22日 The nights on Night

Maybe tonight, I will go for a drive? And take in the Night?
It calls me these days. It misses me, and I miss it.
It asks me not to drink. It asks me not to smoke.
And so I try to do less. And I try to do none at all.
And nothing is easy when you do it alone, nothing at all.
Sometimes it asks me things, and tells me things.

And yet, it leaves with the coming specters of colored dark shades.
It leaves with the purple, and the marmalade colors of orange in yellow.
It leaves with the pink. Oh the pink!
It's so pretty in pink. But it leaves me at times
To deal with itself, in the night. In the dark
Just as I deal with myself.
Could I bring tonight to Night?

And the Night comes for me everyday.
And sometimes it wants to talk to me without words.
And I talk to it, with the windows down and the radio on as I drive.
I looked at the stars, and I saw three of them.

I knew the Night was calling.
I knew the Night was young,
And yet as soon as it would begin
it would be old. But as it got old,
I loved it more. I loved its sincerity.
And I did not want to go away.

I did not want to go back to sleep.
I prayed for wings.

I did not need the sleep,
the wings, ideas of escape.
I could put on airs about myself and others with words.
I could hide away in the night. I could hide in the day.
The Night could hide away in the night. It could hide away in itself.
Just like I could. Just like we could.

But when it was done. And I step out of the car, I would still hear,
I would still hear the Night and see the night.
And I would still be myself.
And myself was telling me to do another lap, to continue driving.
To continue thinking.
To continue wondering about the maker of the night.
The Night and I thought about God, who created the light.
Maybe the Night and I will think about it together tonight?
Maybe we will say nothing.

When I step out of the car, and I walk inside
I forget sometimes that I take the Night with me,
and that very night follows me inside.
Follows me throughout my day. In the day even!
I wonder if the Night took a part of me?

I suppose that's a thought for another night.
On another drive. Onto where the tears of bourbon,
and where the breath of cigars, could not come.

It would be where we allow
the other things, the following things
to wash over everything else,
pulling the towers of knowledge into the sea,
only to push back debris.

We'd never escape the water, and
these feelings of spiritual issues and pain.
And to escape would be no different
than crying in the rain. Wouldn't it?
But I wasn't alone, not tonight.
Not tonight, as I stepped out into it,
looking up.