2011 年9月23日 No sleep (part 2 continued)

I was reading information about statistics for suicide by gun versus homicide, since most people accuse guns of doing both. I suppose having over 10 spoons in your house and being underweight because of starvation is the equivalent to saying the spoons are fascists in league with Nazis or Pol Pot.

So I'm reading along and I find a checklist for people who are thinking about suicide. I was surprised I scored pretty high on the list. Here's the list:

Suicide Warning Signs:

"MTFU" the only true
way to avoid suicide.

• Appearing depressed or sad most of the time.
  (Untreated depression is the number one cause for suicide.) Check. My big ears are not wind resistant when I drive fast with windows down, making things difficult.
• Talking or writing about death or suicide. Check 2. See title of blog and title of post.
• Withdrawing from family and friends [or loss of friends.] Check 3. I have had two friends withdraw from my life within a month and a half.
• Feeling hopeless. Semi-check 3.5.
• Feeling helpless. Semi-check again 4. I'm stuck with Session lager in my fridge until I fix that.
• Feeling strong anger or rage. Nope.
  
• Feeling trapped -- like there is no way out of a situation.Check 5. I feel that way every day as soon as I wake up and realize I will have to pay taxes at some point in my life.
• Experiencing dramatic mood changes. Semi-check 5.5. I've had experiences that change dramatically, and they affect my mood.
• Abusing drugs or alcohol. Semi-check 6. I talk about booze all the time, and I love drinking more than I do breathing.
  
• Exhibiting a change in personality. Check 7. Giving things up for Jew-stuff.
• Acting impulsively. Nope. At least not without reason, and that's not impulsive.
• Losing interest in most activities. Check 8. Jew-stuff has the powah!
• Experiencing a change in sleeping habits. Check 9. No shit.
• Experiencing a change in eating habits. Check 10. No sleep = no time to prepare breakfast. It should be call makefast, since I did not break from fasting.
• Losing interest in most activities. Check 11. Jew-stuff tells me no goyim stuff. Why is this posted twice?! Fuck! I'm losing interest in answering.
• Performing poorly at work or in school. Check 12. I'm not sure how this may apply outside of lacking in sleep.
• Giving away prized possessions. Semi-check 12.5. Does destroying them count? Refer to puzzling.
• Writing a will. Not yet.
• Feeling excessive guilt or shame. Check 13.5. I don't like embarrassing people about Jew-stuff.
• Acting recklessly. Check 14.5. Listening to Cop Killer driving 9mph above the posted speed limit qualifies.

So I scored 14.5 points out of 20, with some of my checks as semi-checks of .5 points each. I guess I really need some sleep. Or drugs. Or something. Or drug-somethings.