The following post contains language that is not appropriate for anything.
I have come to the logical conclusion that monsters such as Goblins do exist, and the correlation between me being sick is apparent. My symptoms started with a sore throat, in which I wasn’t able to swallow without a significant level of discomfort. In fact, I would have drooled my way through the weekend, but unless I’m wearing a bicycle helmet I can’t really get away with this. The second symptom was some kind of roughness in my lungs, which had no immediate effect on breathing other than more discomfort. Now the third was coughing phlegm, at first a light yellow, and then later a thick green.
 |
| Ukobach, the distant cousin of the green-jizzin'-goblin |
How does this relate to goblins? Well it doesn’t unless you assume that goblins exist and in the middle of the night when I’m sleeping, - if I can actually get that far since being sick makes sleeping hard - they are gang-raping my throat. Jizzin’ all up inside my nose, my mouth, and somehow into my lungs. I now understand why people who do fellatio for a living put condoms on dicks before they go to town them. Frankly no one wants to be coughing up man sauce that went down the wrong tube. Somehow imagine these goblin creatures or goblin like creatures as Ukobach, but instead of a pan full of coals, it's a pan full of sauce via a goblin named "Alfredo [sauce]."
 |
| Me too! |
The forth symptom is the sweats and chills, which prevents me from sleeping well. On top of that I’m having depressing dreams about my friends. I don’t really like how that haunts me, and comparatively I’d rather have the goblin sauce. I feel like such a retard for not having no clear solutions.
Somehow with all the coughing, I understand what it’s like for old-people to be sick, excluding my PVNS, which by the way is still hurting, and I blame it on the weather, economy, and negation of a healthy intake of food since getting sick usually takes away my desire to eat. The intense flexing, inflation, and deflation of my lungs is just exhausting while coughing. I’m wondering if I could expire from that alone. Sometimes I kind of wish I could. Hopefully it’s not from choking on nasty greenish globs of goblin spawn-miracle-whip.
Somehow with all the coughing, I understand what it’s like for old-people to be sick, excluding my PVNS, which by the way is still hurting, and I blame it on the weather, economy, and negation of a healthy intake of food since getting sick usually takes away my desire to eat. The intense flexing, inflation, and deflation of my lungs is just exhausting while coughing. I’m wondering if I could expire from that alone. Sometimes I kind of wish I could. Hopefully it’s not from choking on nasty greenish globs of goblin spawn-miracle-whip.
As for the rest of my day, well shit it’s not even over yet.
In one of my classes the instructor asked a student if he knew the whole Jew – or Hebrew for those who are politically correct – alphabet (or Aleph bet). So some reform black Jew kid raises his hand, and more or less gets through the whole thing without any serious problems, except for a 4 second delay on two or three of them.
The teacher congratulates his abilities with a casual nod, and proceeds to move towards his bag, pulling out a book of matches. My first thought, is “What the holy shit?!” Because I cannot understand why a book of matches is necessary. I also elected poor vocabulary in my brain as a reaction to such. Now, the teacher moves over to the kushim (ancient African, or their descendants), he lights a match and hands it to the kid telling him to begin again. What the fuck? The kid breezes through the task, and I think it’s apparent that he has some experience reading or reciting the alphabet, as he blew out the match with an exaggerated face.
Now the fun part begins. The teacher walks to the front of the class, opens his bag again grabbing more books of matches! He starts passing out books of matches to everyone. You get the idea. I didn’t get burnt, but damn, that’s pretty serious business. I think if I was an employer, I would do tests like this to potential employees in the interview process when I ask them to describe how they feel about their father (or mother), or their long term goals in relation to the value of X or Y company’s credit and stock rating.
Beyond all of that, a degree of emotional isolation has been pestering me. Once again I’m at odds with the lyrics of songs I listen to. I don’t feel bad picking and choosing what I agree with, instead of either agreeing or disagreeing 100%. Some songs have great lyrics EXCEPT for one section or a few. We all know this.
In one of my classes the instructor asked a student if he knew the whole Jew – or Hebrew for those who are politically correct – alphabet (or Aleph bet). So some reform black Jew kid raises his hand, and more or less gets through the whole thing without any serious problems, except for a 4 second delay on two or three of them.
The teacher congratulates his abilities with a casual nod, and proceeds to move towards his bag, pulling out a book of matches. My first thought, is “What the holy shit?!” Because I cannot understand why a book of matches is necessary. I also elected poor vocabulary in my brain as a reaction to such. Now, the teacher moves over to the kushim (ancient African, or their descendants), he lights a match and hands it to the kid telling him to begin again. What the fuck? The kid breezes through the task, and I think it’s apparent that he has some experience reading or reciting the alphabet, as he blew out the match with an exaggerated face.
Now the fun part begins. The teacher walks to the front of the class, opens his bag again grabbing more books of matches! He starts passing out books of matches to everyone. You get the idea. I didn’t get burnt, but damn, that’s pretty serious business. I think if I was an employer, I would do tests like this to potential employees in the interview process when I ask them to describe how they feel about their father (or mother), or their long term goals in relation to the value of X or Y company’s credit and stock rating.
Beyond all of that, a degree of emotional isolation has been pestering me. Once again I’m at odds with the lyrics of songs I listen to. I don’t feel bad picking and choosing what I agree with, instead of either agreeing or disagreeing 100%. Some songs have great lyrics EXCEPT for one section or a few. We all know this.
So, How do you feel?
No comments:
Post a Comment