I told a co-worker that I said running is not a sport, because other players cannot affect another runner's ability to achieve his or her score, much like bowling, darts, or drinking.
She frowned at me, as if she was going to give up, since she could not or would not give either a rebuttal or rejection towards my opinion other than the classic, "Well I respect your opinion, but...." Not only did her train of thought end there. It fucking derailed with no survivors. I have not heard stupid shit like that since I last saw an efukt video (Never Safe For Work), that had dialog like this:
Camera dude: What's your name?
Black chick: Africa.
She frowned at me, as if she was going to give up, since she could not or would not give either a rebuttal or rejection towards my opinion other than the classic, "Well I respect your opinion, but...." Not only did her train of thought end there. It fucking derailed with no survivors. I have not heard stupid shit like that since I last saw an efukt video (Never Safe For Work), that had dialog like this:
Camera dude: What's your name?
Black chick: Africa.
Camera: Africa? That's original. Did you come up with that on your own? Or was it because ebony and mocha were already taken?
His belittling goes on and on. And it's just that one chick in the video.
His belittling goes on and on. And it's just that one chick in the video.
It's quite funny, until I realized that many of these women are probably abusing drugs, are stupid, or just trying to pay for college tuition (which is probably the worst out of them all).
Anyhow, the point I wanted to make to my co-worker was that running isn't a sport. Yes it is exercise and yes it is a work out. So if running is a sport, then Tae-Bo must be a fucking super-sport? I want to ask her if she thinks what Richard Simmons does is a sport or not, or if yoga is a sport. Hell, with my coworker's lack of explanation of her logic, even Zumba is a sport!
I recall reading something like:
"There are only two sports: motor racing and bull fighting. Everything else is just a game."
Ernest Hemingway
I'd feel bad for my coworker, and her inability to explain why running is a sport, but frankly I can't feel bad for her. I know the more questions I have the faster she'll give up. What's worse is that if I didn't not have to know her, I would question her Vietnamese ancestry. Hell the Vietnamese fought for at least 10 years, and she's giving up in less than 10 minutes. I guess what confuses me is how she presented running to me.
She: *Sniffles*
Me: Are you okay?
She: I'm okay, it's just my immune system from all the miles.
Me: But don't you run to stay healthy? How does it make sense for you to be unhealthy because of running? Wouldn't you cut down your mileage?
She: It's not as bad as other people.
Wait. What the fuck? All of which I actually said, except for the "What the fuck?" First, if you're doing something to stay healthy and it makes your immune system weak, how the fuck does that make sense?
Seriously! And she looks at me like I'm an idiot for raising these questions.
No surprise she came up with no logical answers other than, "I really love running, and it's therapeutic." Which is a valid argument, but not when someone declares that they run (primarily) for health reasons. It wasn't until well after 7 minutes did she mention such. I will note that I did bring up chess and how that's a sport, and yet she said, "Well that's a mental sport."
Is not the brain an organ?
Don't you need organs for sports?
What happen's if a chicken's head is cut off?
Doesn't it run a marathon before dying?
It was a shame that she could not explain these things to me.
Yes I'm aware of what Wikipedia says:
She: It's not as bad as other people.
Wait. What the fuck? All of which I actually said, except for the "What the fuck?" First, if you're doing something to stay healthy and it makes your immune system weak, how the fuck does that make sense?
Seriously! And she looks at me like I'm an idiot for raising these questions.
No surprise she came up with no logical answers other than, "I really love running, and it's therapeutic." Which is a valid argument, but not when someone declares that they run (primarily) for health reasons. It wasn't until well after 7 minutes did she mention such. I will note that I did bring up chess and how that's a sport, and yet she said, "Well that's a mental sport."
Is not the brain an organ?
Don't you need organs for sports?
What happen's if a chicken's head is cut off?
Doesn't it run a marathon before dying?
It was a shame that she could not explain these things to me.
Yes I'm aware of what Wikipedia says:
"[A] sport is all forms of physical activity which, through casual or organised participation, aim to use, maintain or improve physical fitness and provide entertainment to participants."
Sexual intercourse anyone? Going to church could be considered a sport if you went to one of those crazy black gospel churches where people are standing up dancing around... The point is that my opinion doesn't mean shit, actually her opinion matters since we're talking about shit she enjoys. The downside is she isn't even able to explain it clearly. Next time I'm going to tell people that yodeling is a sport. I'm sure it would be a sport if one was yodeling into the asshole of an elephant. Not sure if I would pay to see that.
 |
| It's a sport! |
15 years from now I can just see my coworker: a candidate for a Darwin award. Hopefully at a monster truck (sports) show against Grave Digger.
No comments:
Post a Comment