Repugnant Thoughts Everyday (?...): 2012年5月14日 Music is food for the soul & love

(VIDEO heavy)

If music be the food of love, play on;

Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken, and so die.

- Twelfth Night, by ~~Snakeshit~~ Shakespeare

Over the past three days I have been thinking about small talk. What is small talk? What is the most important thing you could find out about a person within the context of small talk? Music has to be in the top 5. "Why?" you ask? Because it's important to acknowledge someone's tastes, as listening to music is often what one enjoys doing with oneself.

If I ask a person what they listen to in terms of music, what they share with me, as above, is what they enjoy when they are alone. So for me to bash on what they like to do when they are alone is like bashing who they are as a person and individual. This is why music for small talk is important, however one shouldn't bullshit another with idiotic things like, "That's cool" when really one may have wanted to say I can't enjoy much like that.

Nothing is more depressing than telling someone you listen to genre X or band Y and hearing from a them,

"That's cool."

Yet 10 minutes later in the car they say something like,

"Can we listen to something else?"

What the fuck?

My advice is exactly what I said it is. Be honest and up front about your dislikes and likes. Don't try to be anything you're not. That calm, caring, nice, agreeable person, be it you or anyone who claims to be, only works when you're lying to your family/relatives, co-workers/customers, one-night-stands, and people you would never want to live with anyway.

Saying you agree with, also enjoy, or giving any reinforcement towards a music genre or song a person says they enjoy, for which you secretly disagree with, is like making a broken promise up front. You are promising a compliment, which the listener could take with sincerity - as they ought to trust your word right? - and then secretly at the same moment you clearly disagree on the inside. You didn't break a promise, you made something that was already broken.

This is why asking about music is not only serious but also important. We shouldn't compromise who we are with ourselves when we're trying to share ourselves with others. What we listen to for ourselves is part of that. What's the purpose of getting to know someone? When all we do is either shoot down in secret who they are or doing it with ourselves with them? What a big fucking waste of time. Unless our objective is to take what we want a leave... But that's another repugnant thought for another day.

Here's how it may or should go down,

"I like N'sync."

"I can't listen to them, (because of x reason here...)

If someone has a problem with how you feel about X or Y band, artist, song, concerto, whatever, you can tell that person to "go play hide and go fuck yourself." No one should judge you for who you are with you, unless you're lying or destroying integrity. On a side note I've beat down integrity to the point where only shame and pain is left. So certainly learn from my experience if you can. But time and time again, I ramble...

We should use even more caution with anyone who says,

"I like all types of music."

Unless they're God or a non-human, I'd say that person is flat out lying. We all know that a friend to all is a friend to none.

I can honestly say that I my closest friends have shared music with me in the best way possible. My ex-GFs like music, but whatever they shared with me I couldn't always connect with after we were no longer dating. It was like I loved the songs because I was with them. Yet with my closer friends, we'd basically play "music tag".

One week it's,

"Dude listen to this!"

And then the next,

"Oh dude! Check this band out!"

"Feeling like shit? This song might make you feel better!"

Suggesting songs to those I care about and those back to me, and even now when we hear those songs we sometimes go back to emotions we've had when we first heard it and/or started loving it.

Yes, music is important.

In fact, music shouldn't be an escape, although at times it can be one. The issue where music and sharing one's music with another person becomes difficult is when someone reflects on why they enjoy X or Y band. But don't confuse difficult with problematic in this case.

I think ANY time one reflects on the music they enjoy there is a deeper understand of oneself, but when one avoids explanation, with phrases like, "Just because". It's almost like a person is afraid to create depth within their own being. It's their choice, but personally I genuinely don't like being around people who like things for the sake of liking them or without explanation.

Then again, I believe anyone who bothers sharing anything with me ought to explain oneself, including myself for choosing to listen to them!

Just a few examples, nowhere near the amount I'd like to share,