2012年3月13日 The sound cold makes

Over the past few days, along with celebrations over the holiday and spending time with alcohol, - in my system until I passed out in the shower, found later by the Fozzj - I came to the conclusion that cold makes a sound.

Cold makes a sound that cancels out all other sounds. Cold is a form of pain, but not exclusive to it. Its sound fluctuates, but again still neutralizes all other sounds, including the sounds of our emotions. Cold pain is the best example of such.

What does it mean to neutralize the sound of an emotion? To neutralize hate? Neutral hate? What about neutral love? I can only imagine that neutralizing any emotion is basically the total absence of the emotion, from having either opportunity to affirm itself or negate itself.

***

When I woke up it was my stop. Both of my legs had fallen asleep and were painfully numb. I felt an extreme amount discomfort, pain, and warmth from only the swollen areas of my arthritic laden knee. I hobbled for the doors mimicking a drunk crab. "Hold the door.." I mustered, grabbing onto every railing, as my legs shimmied outside.

The air was wet and miserable. Noise everywhere, but my numbness, pain, and cold took all of it away. I didn't even realize I was cold until I tried to think of something. "[S]omething" never happened.

Bring out your dead!

I took off my cap letting my head get wet. 

Then I reached into my front pocket 

for a coffin nailed and hammered away.

I hammered until the cold was smoked out.
For a moment, I felt sick. Shoddy hammering maybe? 

Or was it something else?

I stopped hearing anything, feeling anything, it got cold.
It was the sound of nothing again.

When I got home went to bed immediately. Staring at the ceiling I felt, for a brief moment, jubilation.

Shedding a tear I slept for 12 hours.